While there are a lot of positive aspects to being an expat and living somewhere new and exciting, one of the downsides has to be the fact that so many of the people you meet are so transient. Whether it’s you or them, it’s likely that one of you will not be in the same place for that long.
I’ve already seen it many times with new friends that I’ve met in Buenos Aires. You plan to hang out with them more and then, the next thing you know, they’re gone. Almost all the people I’ve met are not planning on being in Buenos Aires forever (including myself), so it does make it a bit difficult.
The good thing is that with the proliferation of social networks, you can always keep up with people easily and it gives you a lot of reasons to travel to other places too.
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This intrigues me. Through the process of thinking about possibly moving to Argentina I have determined that the best way to meet friends will be to meet the locals. I know that the tendency for most people, including myself, is to meet people like themselves. Are there a lot of expats who make best friends of other expats?
(forgive me for my ignorance)
Josh
If I may chime in here–I've been an expat for 8 years–first in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, and then here in BsAs since 2004.
It is very difficult to make friends with locals because they are usually busy leading normal lives–work, home, family, vacations. (This is in addition, of course, to language and cultural differences.)
Whereas expats who speak the same language tend to do the same things, and so meet and become comfortable with each other.
I have no plans to leave Argentina, and I see friends come and go, come and go, and it's not easy.
Although I am not yet a true expat, I do spend a lot of time in BsAs. For me the transient nature of the people I meet is a positive joy, I can now claim to have friends all over the world.
That is one of the positive aspects. And like I said, with Facebook, I can see what they're up to across the world.
As Cherie says, with the language and cultural differences, the easiest people to meet initially are other expats. i would think that as time went on, it would become easier to meet other people, but when you first arrive, you often want to stick with what you are most comfortable with. For example, Sugar Bar in Palermo is owned by expats and has become the de-facto expat hangout.
i can relate to this. i have lived in argentina off and on for the past ten years (currently in mendoza). i know we will not be here too much longer, but our closest friends are local argentines, and it breaks our hearts to bid them farewell eventually (i experienced the same tristeza when leaving salta after two years). there is a huge expat community here in mendoza, but some are starting to pack it up and head north. i also have clients visit, and it's hard to see them come and go (i had a special picnic yesterday at the foot of aconcagua with a group of 20). life can be turbulent and ever-changing, but at least technology can alleviate the dolor. i have not personally met 99% of those members of banewcomers…but i will miss you all just the same when it is time to leave.
dave – let's link up our blogs amigo.
From my experience of working in frankfurt, I had pretty much the same thing. Most people didn't want to stay there forever because it's so 5/10 in a manner of speaking and you'd end up going out with the so called work-mates time after time and not really getting into the local life style.
of course language is a big barrier but the company I was working at just didn't really care about giving language courses most of the time, and when they did it was during a full on software crunch. Living in another world… I swear.
Maybe the best thing you an do is pack yourself off to the Antarctic. Then at least you've got realistic expectations *scoff*
Just had to chime in here because this topic has come up a lot with friends both here and elsewhere lately. I have a roommate who's from LA and 8 years my junior. We're both here for a long time, but many, many people keep passing through for school, work or time off. When I'm in a foreign country, I rarely find myself seeking out other Americans. I want to get in touch with the culture of a place and that means hanging with the locals.
But now I see why so many people end up banding with other extranjeros. Not just here, and not just Americans, but in any expat situation. First of all, they're looking for friends, too. Whereas when you meet a local, they're already completely settled into their lives. New friends are a luxury, one that's not even necessarily desired. For other extranjeros, it's a need. And when you meet one, especially the ones who struggle with the language, they are always all the more excited to make friends (even if you're more reluctant for the very same reason).
I've been fortunate with work (all locals), sports (a mixed group), and in finding a girlfriend here. I tend to be more picky about which extranjeros I hang with now, depending if they have the same cultural attitude and desire to speak Spanish. I don't feel great about that sometimes, but there are so many Americans here, it's been a step I had to take.
I definitely understand what you're saying. Many extrañeros bond together for exactly those reasons: common language, no existing social ties, etc. I can understand that you're picky as well, not everyone is a good social match – just living in Buenos Aires does not make people friends.
we just got here in ba for the second time and would enjoy meeting others. I have nothing against other xpats and we enjoy birding. So let us know! ken /mahara
Enjoy BA. I'm back in the States for awhile but hope to be back at some point soon!
call when you are in town. kg
Hey, this is my first weekend in BA and came down for a month by myself (working)….Any good places for meeting people?